if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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