She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Randomize
