He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
