I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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