the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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