I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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