we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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