either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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