Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
