Soap is not a condiment
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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