i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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