I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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