sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
