I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
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