My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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