the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize