it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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