wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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