dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize
