Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many bounce houses so little time
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize