I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
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