Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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