Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.