I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no