Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
