We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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