I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
