go do what you do best...puke behind churches
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
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