Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I just want nice things and good sex
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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