So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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