i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
25 Men Talk About the First Time They Went Down On A Woman
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
23 Ex Fraternity Brothers & Sorority Sisters Confess Their Most Insane Stories
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.