Pregnant stripper...not hot.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Randomize
