accomplished twins. life is a go
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
