Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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