Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
