Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Randomize