i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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