Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I would fuck him just for his dog
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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