Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
