Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I skipped work to stalk him.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
