I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
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