Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
