Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
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