Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize