im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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