Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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