Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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