if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Randomize
