Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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