Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
