This is not my ceiling
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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